Work:life:mum balance

Many people talk about trying to get that perfect balance, and the 'mummy guilt' that plagues us all in the hunt for this nirvana. Well, from all my research and attempts to reach that balance, I can firmly conclude that... it doesn't exist!

On paper, my balance right now is perfect for me. I work 3 days a week in the office which gives me 3 lovely days of sitting down, drinking hot drinks, not having to hide in the kitchen when I want to eat a snack, and plenty of adult conversation. Plus, my favourite thing, colleagues to acknowledge my hard work and other ways to measure if a day has been successful. I then get 2 days with bean all to myself, we can go wherever, whenever and see whoever (well, all around the strict 12-2 naptime, life is not worth living without this!).

This all sounds pretty perfect, right? But somehow, my brain seems stuck in 'the grass is always greener on the other side' mode. At work, I yearn after my little bean, wish I was with her and spend far too long looking at photos of her (or demanding that nana sends me photos of her every hour). And at home, I just wish I could have the perks I get at work.

The below page from the Ladybird book "The Mum" totally sums up my fears as a stay at home mum. I will be stood at the school gates, safe in the knowledge that I have a PhD and have contributed to important research into a cure for cancer, yet all I will be judged on is the behaviour and ability of my sproglets. Which is ultimately out of my control. It's no wonder that you get "pushy mums". 

I'm in a very lucky position as I choose to work because I want to. We have enough money to be flexible (although my salary is basically cancelled out by childcare fees!) and we have good support through my mother-in-law. I even get to travel on work conferences in the knowledge that someone else can look after little bean.

Taking a break from motherhood in the Lake District

I guess the secret is to live in the moment, using those wonderful 'Mindfulness' techniques my dad tried to teach me. Maybe one day I will be content with my lot.

 What do you think is the best balance?